Little Helping Hands

People always ask me "How do you do it all and stay so calm?" and to be honest.. I don't have a complete answer for that. What I do know, is that I don't stop to think, about all the little people at my feet, or the endless amounts of things on my to do list, that never seems to go away. I just do what I need to, without thinking to hard.. I guess!

But the one thing that really does help me to stay on top of it all is... my kids... my super helpful incredible kids!

Now, My kids did not become my sidekicks in fighting daily to do lists over night. It was a gentle process that started already when they were able to pick up a toy. I know this might not sound real to some of you. And this may be a tricky subject depending on different parenting views. But I strongly believe that it is one of my tasks as a mother to teach my kids how to be strong, independent and capable human beings. Therefore, teaching them at a young age to do real life tasks, appropriate to their own abilities of course. But guess what the best part is.. They start to become able to do things around the house, on their own, so that you can get to doing all the rest!

Does it sound to good to be true? Well to some maybe. And some kids will be more helpful than others. But I'm going to give some tips from my first hand experiences that may help you get your kids more involved with everyday tasks around the house.

First off here is a quick list of what my own kids are able to do:

O#1 (10 years old)

- take out the garbage/sort the recycling/put out and bring in bins on garbage day

- load/unload the wash machine, load/unload the dryer and carry laundry up and down the stairs

- walk the dog, pick up dog poo, feed the dog

- walk younger siblings to school (without needing to cross the street)

- Put folded laundry away (helping younger O's with theirs)

O#2 (8 years old)

- feed the cat

- sort and organize toys

- read bedtime stories/help with home reading

- help younger siblings change clothes

- serve breakfast (toaster waffles, yogurt, cereal)

- Wash windows (with norwex cloths)

O#3 (6 years old)

- empty backpacks and lunch pails

- pack lunches (with help from older O's and usually Mom)

- set the table for dinner

- Vacuum area rugs and stairs (battery operated vacuum)

- Dust (with a dust mitt)

O#4 (4 years old)

- pull weeds (with Mom's guidance)

- Wash dishes (close supervision)

- Help with baking

- tidy her room/toys (independently)

O#5 (20 months old)

- clean up toys (with some direction)

- empty dishwasher (hands dishes to mom or dad to put away)

Now in my experience, the tasks listed above are indeed within the skill set of children of that age. But keep in mind every child is different and learns and grows at different rates. You will ultimately have to decide what your child can handle or is mature enough to do. And I don't expect you to be able to give your child one of those tasks and have them be able to do it independently, right off the bat! Each of my kids started out doing the tasks of the 20 month old and their skill sets grew from there.

It starts out with you sitting on the floor with your small babe who just learned how to pick up a toy, and encouraging them to place it in a container.

Encouraging your toddler to help you water the plants with a watering can.

Daily play with cleaning tools or toys that allows your child to pretend to help you clean, while you clean.

Letting your child swish around the mop a few times while your already washing the floor.

Giving your child a wet cloth to wash the windows, or let them try their hand at washing the dishes for the first time knowing you may have more water on the floor than in the sink when they're done, but that's where the learning starts.. its got to start somewhere!

Take the time to explain what you are doing when you start the wash machine, cook supper, fold the laundry. Literally Explain Everything... until you start to feel like your narrating your entire life!

Lead by example, showing and finding joy in these everyday tasks.

Let them explore the things they are naturally drawn to explore, which is what they see you doing every single day! By nature, most kids really do want to be helpful.. its just a matter of giving opportunities to learn how or letting them try. Sometimes they will fail, but then your there to help and show them the ropes.. so that one day when your not.. they CAN do it, without fear of failure!

Some people say it is a child's job to play and learn and that household chores should not be their responsibility. But I say, this IS learning. It's giving them confidence that they can apply to their school and social life. This IS play, make it fun, make it a game, reward them for their hard work and having accomplished new things!

I remember back when there was only 3 little ones at my feet, my husband worked late, our dishwasher was broken, the nightly chore of washing the mound of dishes while the kids destroyed the house become daunting. Until my, then 3 year old, asked me if she could play with the soapy suds.. my first thought was, No, I need to get this done quick so I can move on to the next thing.. but then I thought.. why not? I threw a bunch of soap suds on our ceramic floor and she happily swooshed the suds around while I washed up all the dishes. The other two joined in, so I tossed them some tea towels and they dried up the floor. What started out a dreaded chore, ended in giggles, clean dishes.. and even a clean floor! This became a nightly routine for us for a long time, and we created some very happy memories while doing so!

With some creativity, there are lots of ways you can get your kids involved! And in the end everyone will be happier for it. Don't get me wrong though its not always easy and they're not always willing. My kids are also not expected to do all these things on their own everyday.. but I have taken the time to teach them these skills, so when my hands are full or my plate seems too much, I can give them a job and I know they CAN do it.

So, with all that said, are you ready to get your kids more involved?

What's the worst that can happen...

They might just surprise you!